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“She looked like a model, to be honest, and when we started talking she was so friendly.
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“It’s nice to be judged on me completely stripped back, not on the clothes I wear and the jokes I make,” the victor gushed. When was that ever a better expression of someone’s soul than, say, their labia?
In fact, all the contestants seemed to have drunk the show’s Kool-Aid.
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Its chief proposal seemed to be that the modern dating game is a shallow business, where superficial things like “status symbols”, “online profiles” and, well, “clothes” get in the way– and so why not have people being deeper with each other by, in the first instance, scrutinising each other’s naked bodies?
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First up as picker was music producer Aina, who gave the six penises dangled in front of her the thoughtful scrutiny of Mary Berry analysing a prize bake.